The Day I Was Told I Didn’t Belong

Author

Ed Clementi
March 03, 2025

It was late—around 10 PM, and I was still at my desk. Another long night, grinding, pushing, proving myself.

I had built my career on saying yes to every opportunity—early in, last out, always looking for ways to grow.

So when the email popped up—an invite to a breakfast hosted by one of the company’s top executives—I didn’t hesitate.

I had applied for these before. Every time, I was passed over. But this time, it was different.

I was there when the email arrived. I fired off my request within seconds.

Surely, this time, I’d get in.

A few days later, the response landed in my inbox.

“Unfortunately, you were not selected.”

Again.

I sat there for a second, staring at the screen. Frustrated. Annoyed. But more than anything—determined.

I could have just moved on. Could have ignored it, chalked it up as another loss. But no, I wasn’t going to sit back and accept it. Not this time.

I picked up the phone and called the department organizing the event.

"I’ve been trying to get into one of these for a long time. This time, I was literally at my desk when the email went out. I had to be one of the first to respond. So… is there selection criteria I don’t know about?"

The woman on the other end hesitated. “Give me a few hours—I’ll look into it.”

A few hours later, another email landed.

I was in.

The Room Where It Happened

I arrived early, ready, eager. This was my moment to sit at the table, to listen, to learn, to contribute.

I took my seat—two spots to the left of the host.

The room filled, breakfast was served, and then the executive leaned forward and spoke.

“I don’t want to know your name. I just want to know what school you went to and what department you work in and we’ll go from there.”

And suddenly, the excitement I felt turned into something else.

The confidence I had going in was completely drained. My stomach tightened.

Because I knew exactly what was coming.

Waiting for My Turn

One by one, they answered. Harvard. Yale. Wharton. Stanford.

I sat there, nodding, pretending to listen. But inside, I was at war with myself.

I had worked so damn hard to get here. But now? It wasn’t about my work. It wasn’t about my ability. It was about a name on a diploma.

And that? That wasn’t something I could change.

I scanned the room, hoping. Maybe someone else had taken the unconventional path. Maybe someone else wasn’t part of the Ivy League pipeline.

But no. Every single person had the pedigree.

And my turn was getting closer.

What would I say?

Would I say my school’s name confidently, with pride? Would I rush past it quickly? Would I be dismissed before I even had a chance to speak?

I didn’t know. But I had decided—when it was my turn, I was going to own it.

And then—time ran out. The breakfast ended before it ever got to me.

And to this day, I still wonder—would I have had the courage to say it boldly? Would I have spoken my truth the way I wanted to? I’ll never know.

More Than a School Name—Who You Are Matters More

I left that room with a choice to make.

Would this be my reality forever? Would there always be a ceiling? Would my work always be secondary to where I came from?

Or would I use this as fuel?

I made my decision. If I ever had the chance to sit on the other side of the table, I would never make someone feel like they didn’t belong.

One day, I’d run my own leadership breakfasts. And I’d never ask where someone went to school. Instead, I’d ask:

  • Who are you?

  • What drives you?

  • What’s the most meaningful thing you’ve worked on?

  • What’s one skill you’re trying to build right now?

  • What’s a challenge you’re facing, and how can I help?

Because it’s not the name on the diploma that defines you—it’s the heart, the determination, and the impact you make. It’s the way you show up, how you push forward, and the value you create that truly matters.

Where You Went Matters Less Than Where You're Going

Years later, I became a Managing Director—just nine years after walking in as an Executive Assistant.

And while I didn’t go to an Ivy League school, I eventually found myself leading teams that included people who did. But at that point, it was never about the school. It was about the work.

Your diploma isn’t what drives results—your ability to think, adapt, and execute is.

Your ability to simplify, solve problems, lead, and get things done—those are your credentials.

So if you ever find yourself questioning whether you belong, remember this:

  • Your work will always speak louder than your résumé.

  • Execution beats entitlement.

  • It’s not where you came from, it’s what you do now.

So don’t waste time questioning whether you belong. Do the work, deliver with impact, and make yourself undeniable.

With Absolute Sincerity,

Ed Clementi, Founder & CEO of Inspired Fire, LLC

Make an Impact.  Feel an Impact.